I was torn between two events. One that had been planned months ahead and an accomplishment granted to me that I've just known two days before. The former meant compromising my happiness and credibility from a person but the latter meant the fruit of the hard labor I've sown for those three years I've been in the academe.
I can't afford sacrifices. The former meant sacrificing my encounter with one person, the latter meant sacrificing my encounter of one prestigious event. But the former is more important to me. I want her to feel I'm not taking her for granted, that it is solely that person and no other past to interfere. The latter will meant my credibility is at stake. I have waited for this and I have wanted for this. It will add colors to my credentials for my future.
But here I am all packed up, after a strenuous battle in my inner self. I was torn, I don't know what should take place. Everyone will think this is not right, why this decision. I am bound to explain for my self after this. God help me.
