its going to be my birthday after two days. -- and i feel down, sad, empty. what else??
I woke up with a couple of text messages, two from my mom telling me about my petition in Canada and for me to go online. Well, I did. And there, it struck me the BAD news.
I got denied for the petition. They were asking stuff like what I did for the last 08 and 09. But i already stated it in details on the form that they sent me. I am so down with this. I really do want to go there, although it had me thinking for sometime. Do i really want to be in there? I'll be again stuck with my family. In which, I am starting to want to be more independent. I am on my early adulthood right now. I need to stand on my two feet without them accompanying me. Although I will definitely be kinda homesick again (i cry when i miss everyone who used to be in our house when i was younger).
Another form of rejection. Haist.
As me and my mom are talking about it. I checked my email and viola! CGFNS sent me a message confirming my address details. Got my visascreen! wootwoot. It is not actually yet the final verdict but next will be the final result. :) This is the GOOD news. I have waited and hoped for this for around two months already. Previously, because my Illinois license took time to be accomplished and now cgfns have received it :) weeee
And both of these came nearly just minutes apart. What would i suppose to feel?? i still feel empty i guess.
Got no one to share it with.
I am hoping someone or something will utterly make me smile this week. Not just a short simple smile, but that thing that will dig down to my unfilled heart. God, make me feel that. :) I know everything will fill the right places in the right time, but I hope this will be the right time.
Got no plans for my birthday. If i could just make it pass by just like an ordinary day. I personally would want to do something different this day. But what is it? Hope someone will make me smile on this day. I know someone who will, but i don't think she is suppose or will do. Not even worth it.
