USRN when?

I feel like engaging into bungee jumping with this present situation.  You've prepared yourself, trusted your guts, placed your life on the ropes and the people securing you to it.  Many have succeed with their goals which is to conquer fears and feel the unrelenting joy, but one can never assure.  I may be reacting too much with this, I have a bit of assurance but still I will never know.  What if yes I am prepared and I know for myself that somehow I gave my best and I know I have my stand for gaining a favorable result with this licensure, but still it is out of my hand to know what is really my stand with it until the result is yet unseen. 

I am scared that I might have the not so good result.  I wouldn't know how will I take it.  Everything is laid in front of me.  The comfort for preparing my horses, the supportive and understanding people around me, the time to prepare, the materials to begin with, the tips for how to do it, and everything wonderful in stored with it was arranged for me unconditionally. 

This thing I really need to get is needed for me to move on with my next step.  With this, everything will be in place again after my previous attempts that failed.  I am crossing my fingers for a fruitful answer.  I am embracing the future that was already planned for me.  I will know the answer may be now, maybe later, maybe tomorrow.  With just few clicks, I will know how I am judged.  



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please give this to me this time.
there'll be two things that i will cry for. 
joy or disappointment.
i am hoping for the former.